What will be will be

Nepal is a very fatalistic country. Basically, what is meant to happen will happen in its time, and usually this time scale is extremely slower than you want it to be. Compared to the hyper pace of American lifestyle, things crawl here.

I am used to having control of most aspects of my life. I am used to getting in car and driving where I need to go on my own schedule. I am used to having electricity when I need to use it. I am used to being able to find what I need, quickly and efficiently. I am used to having a set schedule based  around what I need in my life. I am used to communicating with people and having them understand my intentions and meaning. I am used to controlling and having my own living environment.

In Nepal, I am forced to give this all up.

I am at the mercy at the environment, my friends, my coworkers. I have to trust them to look out for me, to take care of me, no matter how much pride and independence I want to reserve for myself. Everyday is a challenge to make it through the day, to get what I need, to not overspend, and to not use too many resources.

These must be the experiences that change your life. The groundlessness is chaotic and unnerving, but I think therapeutic in some ways. These are the places, the times when you grow. I will have to give up my grasp in order to enjoy the beauty around me.

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